Look for the moments of joy around you, not in the future

Buddha once met a young man walking along the bank of a river. The man was smiling and looked happy. Buddha asked him the reason for his smile. He said, “I am thinking of a wonderful life,” Buddha asked again what he meant by a wonderful life.  The young man said; “One day I will be rich. I will marry a beautiful woman. I will then get a dog and come here for walks. I will enjoy the scenery.  It will be a wonderful life.” The Buddha then asked, “Haven’t you got it already?”

Let us pause and think.  Joy is around us. However, like the young man, we don’t identify it.

Joy means feeling good in a moment. It is in what we see, hear or experience in our daily life. But we often overlook it as we are busy making long term happiness goals.

How can we develop the attitude of embracing joy in our daily life?

Develop an attitude of gratitude

There is no harm in seeking more but we need to be thankful for what we already have. Remember, the time when we bought something new, for example a smart phone. How happy we were. But, as time passed by, the sense of joy diminished even if we still use it. Why? Because now we take it for granted and aspire for a different model. The lesson, therefore, is when we take things for granted, we let pass the opportunities of being joyful. Practice thankfulness every day. This will increase happiness and decrease depression.

Celebrate little successes

Just like there are milestones on highways, our life goals need to be broken into small achievable targets. Reward yourself when you achieve these targets. Achievements create joy, no matter how little they appear. Wish people well and celebrate their achievements as well.

Explore joy in your daily chores

We do a number of activities at home, at work, with friends/colleagues or alone. We like some of them and some we don’t.  Select at least one activity that you do every day and make it more enjoyable for you.  For example, I changed my coffee cup and the experience of coffee changed. Similarly, if you are into walking, try taking a different route sometime for the fun of it.  If you are into sports, play with the intention of enjoying the game rather than winning because the pressure of winning gets the pleasure out of sports. If you like solitude, find time for yourself and do what you like. If you like meeting people, meet those you like, as often as possible.

Be a source of joy to others

This is the most powerful of all techniques. Spread joy to others. Think what you can do to make someone happy. It can be a small thing like a phone call to a friend, a visit to someone, or sharing a decent joke. Let go of anger and grudges. Forgive others and seek forgiveness.

In short, Identify the moments of joy. They are around you, not in the future.